Family Law Blog

How to Handle a Divorce from a Difficult Spouse

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Divorce is never easy or painless at the best of times, but it becomes infinitely more difficult when the one of the spouses chooses to be difficult or has a difficult personality. In such cases, you can expect the divorce to be prolonged, delayed, and even more expensive.

Some spouses are much more likely to refuse to compromise, refuse negotiations, and will want their day in court. How do you deal with a spouse who insists on making the divorce as ugly as possible?

Unfortunately, there isn't much that you can do to change your spouse’s behavior. In fact, it is probably better for you to come to the understanding that a person can't change his or her ways, and therefore, you need to make the best of your situation. If you plan to try mediation, get a mediator who is very well experienced in handling a contentious or difficult client.

Hire a Los Angeles family lawyer, who has experience in practicing trial law. In other words, you need an attorney who is ready right from the start to take your case to court, because that is where your case will probably end up.

If it's difficult for you to maintain face-to-face communication with your spouse, then limit personal contact to the minimum. Use e-mails and messages to communicate as much as possible.

Realize that just because your spouse is being difficult doesn't mean that you have to be too. That means that you don't necessarily have to dispute every little point that is brought up. Compromise on some issues simply to end the matter, and if the issue isn't really that serious anyway. In other words, don't try to prolong the divorce, simply because he or she is doing so.

Longer Commutes Increase Divorce Risks

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Couples who have longer commutes to work are at a much higher risk of meeting with a Los Angeles divorce lawyer. According to new research by three scientists, couples who have at least a 45-minute one-way commute to work every day, are much more likely to find themselves in divorce court, compared to those who have shorter daily commutes.

The study, which was published recently in the British journal Urban Studies, monitored millions of Swedish citizens between 1995 and 2005. The researchers found that 11% of the couples that were monitored as part of the study had divorced by 2000. They also found that couples who divorced, were much more likely to commute long distances to go to work.

13% of the couples in which one or both of the spouses had at least a 45-minute commute to work every day, ended up divorcing. However, according to the analysis only 10% of the non-commuter couples had divorced.

The results of the study point to the effect of stress on the relationship. Couples, who have long 45-minute commutes to work every day, are probably more stressed, especially when both of the couples have such long-distance commutes to work every day.

Stress can kill any marriage. Very often, that stress may simply compound problems that already exist in the marriage, and the couple may have no other choice but to call it quits. If you are currently considering divorce, speak with a Los Angeles divorce lawyer, who can advise you about your options for alimony, child custody arrangements, parenting time, and child support payments.

There are several issues that must be ironed out before you finalize the divorce papers. Divorce can be at testing time for you, and if you aren’t careful can seriously impact your rights over your assets, home or children.

New Hotel Promises to Remove the Stress of Divorce

Wednesday, September 03, 2014

Divorce is a traumatic and stressful affair at the best of times. Even if yours is an amicable divorce, and you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse are on the best of terms you're still going to find it very stressful to deal with the fact that your marriage no longer exists. In New York, a team of enterprising entrepreneurs has announced the opening of a divorce hotel, which promises to help persons going through a divorce, get the process over with in the most stress-free manner possible.

For a price price tag of $5,000, couples who are going through a divorce can enjoy a weekend that comes complete with separate rooms, and a divorce mediation service. While you are finalizing custody arrangements, and parenting time schedules, you can also avail of the hotel facilities, including a number of swimming pools, a golf course and a spa.

According to the promoters of the hotel, a couple going through a divorce can check into the hotel over the weekend, and leave by the end of the weekend, feeling rested, refreshed and having sorted out all those prickly, divorce-related issues. By the time you walk out of the hotel, you will be single, although the judge will have to review the divorce papers that you signed.

According to the promoters of the hotel, there was definitely a need in the market to target people getting a divorce. That works out to approximately 50% of all married people in the country. Going by current statistics, close to half of all American marriages end in divorce. That means a lot of people, at any given time in the US, are either considering divorce, or in the process of divorce, and it is this category of persons that the promoters want to target. Although the concept is new in the United States, such hotels have operated and flourished for years in Europe.

The “Out Of the Blue” Divorce and How to Cope with It

Friday, August 29, 2014

It’s one of the worst types of divorces that Los Angeles divorce attorneys come across. Surprise divorces, or a divorce out of the blue, where one spouse simply informs the other one fine day that he/she is moving out and wants a divorce, can leave thwe other spouse completely shattered.

The decision to divorce is not made overnight. In almost every single case that a Los Angeles divorce lawyer will see, the partner that seeks the divorce, has spent weeks or months, considering the idea of divorce, analyzing pros and cons, and only then making that appointment with a lawyer. Unfortunately, both the spouses in the relationship may not see the warning signs. One spouse may simply be coasting along in the marriage, thinking that everything is going well, and may be taken completely by surprise when the partner breaks the news.

It is usually the men who make the divorce announcement out of the blue. However, as women become more financially independent, they are also becoming much more comfortable about making the sudden decision to walk out of the relationship.

So, what you do when your life is turned upside down by a divorce announcement? The first thing to do is to find your bearings, and quickly. It’s probably best to give up any hopes of making your marriage work by going into couples counseling. If your spouse is adamant about wanting a divorce, couples counseling could be a waste of time.

A sudden end of the relationship like this can be devastating. Once the numbness and the shock have worn off, get yourself together, and speak to a divorce lawyer.

You are devastated, and feel like your life has ended, but it has not. You have finances to get in order, and crucial decisions to make that could impact the rest of your life, and you need a solid divorce attorney on your side. To heal, take some responsibility for the end of the marriage, but at the same time, be gentle on yourself. Have a good support system of family and friends, who can help you get through the grieving process.

Couples Who Smoke Marijuana Less Likely to Be Involved in Domestic Violence

Thursday, August 21, 2014

California's weed users will find the results of a new study encouraging. The study found that couples, who smoke marijuana, are much less likely to be involved in domestic violence incidents.

The study involved a small representative sample of 634 couples. The study analyzed some of the findings about domestic violence among couples who used marijuana. The analysis found that the more often the couple smoked marijuana, the less likely they were to be involved in domestic violence. The most frequent use of pot by couples led to less frequent domestic violence incidents perpetrated by husbands. Frequent marijuana use in this case refers to use that was equal to approximately 2 to 3 times per month or more.

Husbands who used marijuana also reported that there was a lower incidence of domestic violence incidents perpetrated by wives. When both the spouses used marijuana very frequently, couples reported the least incidents of domestic violence perpetration. According to the researchers, marijuana is probably linked to lower levels of aggression towards a spouse or partner. It is also possible that couples who smoke pot together have very similar views and values, and move around in similar social circles. That means a much lower risk of conflict automatically.

If you are currently in a situation where you are being subjected to violence by your partner, take legal action. In a situation like this, you can apply for a protective order, or domestic violence restraining order. You do not have to be married to your partner to apply for a protective order. Speak to a family lawyer in Los Angeles about protecting yourself and your family from violence.

Considering Divorce? Get Working on an Emergency Cash Fund

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

If you are currently considering filing for divorce, there are certain things that you might not have given thought to. For instance, from the time you separate from your spouse till divorce proceedings are complete, and even after, you will probably have little money for your personal expenses, and to take care of your household needs.

Therefore, one of the first things that you must begin doing after you have made the decision to divorce is to get working on creating an emergency cash fund, and putting some money in the fund. If you have your own personal savings bank account, you're on the right path. However, if you do not have your own personal savings bank account, now is the time to open an account.

Open a simple savings account that does not involve heavy bank fees. Open an account with your local bank, and deposit small amounts of money every day. Have a goal of a minimum amount of money that must be put inside into your savings bank account, on a daily or weekly basis.

Stash away some money from your daily expenses. This can be easy to do if you are willing to make some sacrifices, and cut down on expenses. If you are on a very tight budget and can barely make ends meet, then you may have to start cutting down on some of your daily expenses, so that you have some money left over to put into your fund.

For example, consider giving up your cable TV. Look at a much more affordable phone plan that takes care of basic phone calls and messages. Pay yourself first - set aside some money for the emergency cash fund, before you pay your bills. That will ensure that you have a decent amount of money in your savings bank account, when you actually file for divorce.

Adult Children Can Find It Difficult to Cope with Parental Divorce

Sunday, August 03, 2014

Parental divorce is a traumatic and stressful time for children. Studies show that divorce can have an impact on children, when parents separate during childhood. But what happens when adult children have to deal with parents going through a divorce? Such situations are actually becoming increasingly common because of the increase in senior divorce.

According to statistics, the number of gray divorces or senior divorces has actually doubled since 1990. Older couples getting divorces now constitute approximately 25% of all divorces in the United States.

Increasing senior divorce rates mean that many adult parents have to deal with the fact that their parents, who have been married for many decades, are now making the decision to separate. Obviously, the trauma and stress involved when you're an adult watching your parents separate is very different from the experiences of a child. The concerns that you have as an adult when your parents divorce, are unique.

However, divorce lawyers in Los Angeles do see that when adult children watch their parents get divorced, there can be a much longer- lasting and deep impact, because adult children may have many more memories of their family, than younger children. Adults may find the prospect of meeting the mother’s or father’s new romantic partner even more stressful and painful.

Additionally, adult children may be placed in the uncomfortable position of having to become referees when their divorced parents argue with each other at family events and celebrations. The focus at these events may shift from celebrating to keeping the parents away from each other. Some studies indicate that adult women seem to take a much longer time to get over the emotional trauma of a parental divorce, compared to adult males.

Co-parenting with a Problem Parent

Friday, July 18, 2014

Co-parenting is one of the most ideal child custody arrangements after a divorce in Beverly Hills. There are a number of advantages, including increased access to the father, and greater involvement of the father in the child's life. However, these arrangements can be difficult when one parent insists on being difficult.

Not every co-parenting arrangement is smooth and problem-free. Sometimes, parents try to create problems with their attitude, bad behavior, and lack of concern for the child. If you are in an unfortunate situation, where you are co-parenting with a parent like this, you will find coping a challenge. However, you have to place the best interests of the child as top priority, and must continue to engage with the other parent as best as you can for the sake of the child.

That does not mean unnecessary communication. However, it does mean that you continue to maintain open communication, and share information about the child with the other parent. Plan parent conferences where you discuss the progress of the child and problem areas that need to be rectified.

Realize that you can't do anything to change the behavior of your partner, and do the best with what you have. Use phone calls, e-mails, or SMS to keep in contact, if communication becomes problematic.

The one thing that you cannot do is stoop to the level of the other parent. No matter how bad the behavior is, it's important for you to make a stable difference in your child's life. It may not seem like a child sees much, but you can rest assured that your child is observing the behavior of his parents, and will appreciate the efforts that you make to be a stable and calming influence for him.

What Happens to Your Business during Divorce?

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Among the many assets that you can expect to be on the division table during a divorce, the most painful one to part with is your business. You have invested many years of effort in building your business and making it successful. Although divorce can be traumatic even when there is no business involved, it can become much more complicated and stressful when there is a business to be divided.

If you own a business and are currently involved in divorce proceedings, then you know that this is probably the most valuable asset that you own. Division of this asset depends on whether the business was community or separate property. Typically, the business may be considered a combination of separate or community property.

If the business is considered community property, then you need to come to a compromise, and work together to make sure that the business does not suffer. One option is to sell the business, and divide the proceeds. This is one option that divorce lawyers often recommend. However, this isn't always easy, because disposing of a business is difficult and takes time. Besides, you have to ascertain the value of the business. Additionally, if you sell the business, at least one of the spouses is going to be left without a source of income or employment.

Another solution is to divide the business itself. A third option is for the couple to continue operating the business as partners together. This may be seem uncomfortable for the partners, but there's increasing evidence that partners who were married earlier actually make good business partners, provided they are able to keep their personal lives separate from their business.

The court may also award the business to one party, and order him to pay the other party his share of business. The court will determine the value of the business in such cases.

What Is a Co-Parenting Agreement?

Tuesday, July 01, 2014

Parents, who have decided to get divorced or separated, and have decided to live in two separate homes can sign a co-parenting agreement that allows effective co-parenting.

A co-parenting agreement, as the name suggests, spells out clearly all the roles, obligations and responsibilities of each parent in the agreement. What does a co-parenting agreement contain? You may decide have a co-parenting agreement in which you agree to share all information about the child with each other. That includes medical information, the child's extracurricular activities, and information other child's school activities.

You will share with your other child's other parent, information about the child's vaccination records, and emergency medical procedures. In a co-parenting agreement, it's very important that parents work closely together to make sure that the child attends all of the extracurricular activities that he is signed up for without any problem. Each parent must have access to information about the activities the child participates in, the venue, people conducting the activity and so on. All school-related information should equally be shared between the parents. That data includes school progress cards, homework, extracurricular activities, school cultural events and programs, and parent-teacher conferences. As part of a co-parenting agreement, you will also agree to mutually make major decisions about the child jointly.

You may think that all of this is a given, and that you don't need an agreement to spell it out. However, you would be surprised at how quickly matters can sour when two parents are living apart, but taking care of their children together. You may encounter misunderstandings, especially when the two of you begin dating other people, and other potential step-parents, begin to enter the picture. It's best to have everything clearly defined in a co-parenting agreement that you have both signed.